Lust-Love

These last few weeks have been lovely. Despite lots of crappy life-outside stuff, Trist and I have been enveloped in our own little cloud of lust-love.  It's one of those things that seems to come in waves, now and then, and like waves they rise us up, and they make us seem weightless.

We've been together a long time, and as almost everyone who has been in a long-term relationship will tell you, the excitement of those first few months doesn't last.  But that isn't a sad thing - frankly if we had carried on at the rate we were for much longer, we'd have died of exhaustion.  But just because that early pace is not sustainable, doesn't mean the passion is gone.  It sits there, just below the surface, just waiting for the opportunity to come out and say "Hello! Remember me?".  All we need to do is keep our eyes open for those chances, and our lives can be filled with moments as great as the first time.

That's the thing I love most about our marriage; we look for those moments.  We take the time to whisper sweet-nothings, and because we do it allows us to speak our fantasies aloud.

That's what we've been doing this week - fantasies.  And not just, safe, well versed lines, but raw - bare-to-the-soul desires, never before confessed.  It was this that put us in the lust-love cloud.  For the last week we have neglected the housework and fucked with abandon till the early hours, looking at forbidden fruit and, imagining ourselves with other people.  We've pushed at boundaries and left bruises, and this has left us in rather a haze.  Trist has been somewhat distracted at work (me sending him filthy texts probably wasn't that helpful!) and I've been soaking my underwear through.  Several times an hour a flashback to the night before will send me reeling, and the thoughts of the night to come make me weak at the knees.  Lust!

But that's only half of it.  The other particle in the haze is the other L-word, and that's what it's all about.  "How...?" you might ask "...can letting your husband have sex with you while pretending you are someone else, make you fall more in love?".  Well, that's quite a simple question with a very complicated answer, and hopefully that's what we'll be exploring in this blog.  For now, I'll just say that it does. That every time we reveal a fantasy or a secret we break down a barrier, and expose our souls for inspection by the one person we couldn't bare to lose.  When you take that risk and are rewarded with a loving look or a moan of desire; that's where the love blooms.

Issy xx